I could use a nap.....and a bottle of Chianti (in reverse order)

I'm starting to feel a little overwhlemed like Adam these days. There is a lot going on this week, with my mom going into surgery and all and its causing a tightness in my shoulders. I think I need a massage. I feel like I have a knot the size of a golfball on my left shoulder and it has Fordham's name written all over it. Its funny, because out of all of the massages I have given-- I never really received a good one back. If they werent so expensive I would just get one for my birthday.

All this NYC planning is going along pretty well. I might even have a possible buyer for my apartment here in Orlando- which gives me one less thing to worry about. I feel guilty lately because I find it hard to concentrate at work. I feel like its more of my "NYC workstation" because I research so much. Oh well, my works gets done so no worries right? My boss is wearing a long jean skirt today that makes a racket when she walks giving me clear warning if she is coming. Not that I'm scared or anything, but I know if she walks by and sees an NYC related website up on my screen, she knows my head isnt there.

Things I would like to request for the rest of the week:
My Mom's surgery is successful, all goes well, and she has a speedy recovery
My Dad is given the strength to deal with all this
Brian has a safe trip back to Florida- woohoo!
It doesn't rain on Saturday
Lisa has a happy birthday on Thursday!
And even though I am off work tomorrow, I magically get paid anyway

Sucks to be you

Well I'm sure you all may or may not have read about the guy who took naked pics of his girlfriend with his cell phone and was jailed for it. The guy apparently took naked pics of his 17 year old girlfriend and then posted them on the internet. Ok, so the picture taking I guess I can understand. Posting on the internet- uh uh. What makes this little story even more fun is that the girl is 17 and the guy is 20, so the minute he posted the pics on the internet he was dabbling in child pornography. What a dumbass.

So now he is jailed for 6 months and then after he is released, he is banned from using a cell phone or computer for 2 YEARS. Can you imagine that? I mean not everyone is a nerd like me who lives and breathes computers, but a cell phone too? Why cant he just have one that doesnt have picture taking abilities? How do they monitor this anyways? What about school, doesnt he need a computer for that? Sounds to me like he is screwed.

All of this of course brings me to my pondering of the day:
If you had to be banned for 2 yrs from either a cellphone or a computer- which would you choose?

So which one are you?

After years and years of movie watching I have categorized movie watchers into a few different categories. If I have left any out, let me know.

They are as follows:

The analyzer: This person watches the movie, and rips it apart afterwards saying "well that could never happen", "that wasn't realistic", etc. Is it so hard to "imagine"? They take a great movie and make it so that if you did like it before, you dont anymore.

The questioner: This person likes to ask questions before anything happens even if you haven't seen it before. Therefore, you miss all of the text that follows. "Is he going to die?" How the hell should I know? Watch the movie and shut it.

The sleeper:This is the person who falls asleep for about half of the movie and then wakes up at the very end, not asking any questions....and then after the movie says it sucked or was just "ok".

The multi-tasker: This refers to home watching mainly, but its one of those people that starts out watching the movie, and then about 20 minutes into it gets up to unload the dishwasher, or do some laundry, or make some food, or whatever. Then they come back and do the whole "ok so what did I miss?". Is it so hard for people to sit still for 2 hrs? If you can't committ to that I say don't watch the movie.

The phone talker: Now this one can definitely get to you. Its the person who answers their cell in the middle of the movie and continues to have a conversation sitting right there versus going into another room. Everyone in the meantime is straining to hear as their rage builds. I swear these phone talker people are mental.

The movie snob: This is the person that is a complete movie buff and has a huge appreciaton for film. That's good and all, but what comes with that are strict criteria for their viewing pleasure. The movie must be shown in a "good theatre" which I'm guessing is comprised of a suitable screen, stadium seating, and a great sound system. I have had to walk out of a movie I went to see with one of these characters, because they weren't showing it on the biggest screen and he therefore couldn't enjoy it.

The normal, prepared viewer: This is the one I LOVE--because its the one that I am. This person gets all of their "to-do's" done before the movie and is able to sit there through the whole thing and just watch the movie without questions, errands, sleeping, or whatever. A lot of people think they are the normal viewer, but in fact are not.

Soooo, which one are you? Now don't everyone lie and try to be the normal one, because deep down you know the truth...and so do your fellow movie watchers.

"Kids Being Kids"- not an excuse

If there is one thing I can't stand, its a bully. Maybe "bully" isn't even the correct word for it anymore. No I didnt just finish watching "Mean Girls", but I just finished reading an article referring to this kind of behavior. What is it about kids/teenagers that make them do these awful things to each other and not think twice? The author of Woman's Inhumanity to Woman, Phyllis Chesler-MD, recounts a story of one of her patients:

At 13, Kelsey hung with a pack of five girls in her Washington parochial school. Now 20, she recalls in vivid detail the day her pals took her behind the chapel and handed her a note.

"They made it seem like something good, like an invitation or something," she says. "They were smiling. I opened it and it was written in all different colors of inks and handwriting, saying we don't want to be your friend, don't look at us, don't call us, don't come near us. Everyone put it a different way -- they all wrote it."

What is it that possesses kids to do such things? I never had any experiences with bullies or mean girls in highschool or in grade school so I can't really share any first hand experiences, but it must be an awful thing to deal with. I remember in 8th grade there was this girl in our class who was "unpopular". She definitely went through an awkward stage, but who of us didnt? Anyways, she was constantly bothered by the guys in our class. For Christmas, our school did this little market type thing where the kids can buy cheap gifts for their families. Well they had some dog treats for kids to buy for the family pet, but instead, the guys thought it would be funny to buy a whole bunch of dog biscuits a leave them on the girls desk. So mean. I realize thats nothing compared to what some kids go through. This other boy in my grade school class was real quiet and shy and had the most beautiful eyelashes I had ever seen on a guy. Well the guys in my class of course made fun of that, and a few days later I walked into a classroom where I saw him with scissors up to his eyes, trying to cut his eyelashes. It was just so sad. The worst part is that I guess you really dont know how stuff like this affects a kid unless you talk to them. My friends and I found out that 3 years later this boy killed himself.

Even after all this, people still say "its just kids being kids". Well guess what, its not. I never acted like that, my friends didnt act like that--its a shitty excuse. Oh and that main ringleader of "boys" that was involved in bullying both of the kids I mentioned is now in jail for murder. If that doesn't give people a clue, I dont know what will.

I'll take two tickets please, in exchange for my left kidney

I cannot even believe how exspensive theme park tickets are these days. I'm taking my little sister to Universal's Islands of Adventure next weekend and the tickets are now $55 a person. That's crazy. I mean it would be one thing if it was all inclusive, including a meal or something, but judging by the amount of money Ive spent there in the past, one meal comes to around $12 a person--and thats at one of those burger places- not a restaurant. Wow I am the queen of run-on sentences.

Anyways, doesnt anyone remember when Disney or Universal tickets were like $30? Man that was nice. By the time I have kids I dont even want to think what it will cost to take the family to Disney. Every theme park has risen in price except one... and that's Wet 'N Wild. I guess you cant really count it as a theme park, but with all of the discounts they give to FL residents, plus the discount I get at work, a ticket comes to like $12. I get a discount at Universal too, not that it helps much, but I guess its better than nothing.

I am actually really excited to take her there. I just thought it was about time she rode a real rollercoaster, I thinks shes going to love it. I rode my first one when I was 8, I'll never forget it. We were at Busch Gardens and it was called "The Scorpion". It might even still be there, havent been in a while. My poor dad had to go on all of these with me since I was too young to go alone and no one else wanted to go. What a good dad. After that ride on the scorpion my dad took a mini hiatus from rollercoasters with me...aparently I was grabbing his leg on the ride,holding on for dear life, and didnt realize I was pulling out all his leg hairs.

You know you have at least one...

Whenever I am on someones blog I cant help but wonder a few different things about them. Where they went to school, what they do for a living, what area of the country they live in, what they look like, etc. (and other stuff that sounds less stalker-ish).

So for all of you inquisitive wonderers out there, Im giving you two questions to ask. They dont have to be about me unless you want them to be. So go ahead and try me, and I will answer honestly to the best of my ability.

And so it begins...

Well as you all know I am thrilled, but it all seems so surreal at this point.

Since I am a nerd and have an incessant need to "plan", I was already on craigslist this morning looking at some apartments. I know its early but I just wanted to get a feel for what was out there. So anyways, I found this great apartment, pics look great, good neighborhood, so I emailed the realtor saying that Im sure its to early for this apartment but if he knew of anything opening that was similar to this apt, in the August timeframe. The conversation that followed is somewhat interesting:

Realtors response to my original inquiry: I will ask the owner of the building, but you may be looking too soon.

Me: Yea, I figured as much. Can I ask you a question? My friend and I are moving there in late August and one of us will be attending NYU and the other will be at Fordham. What neighborhood would you suggest as a good middle ground between the 2 schools?

Realtor: Where is Fordham again? (um ok, fair enough I guess, but I would think an NYC realtor would be up to date on this kind of info)

Me: It is in the Lincoln Center area

Realtor: Where is Lincoln Center? (OK- LOL- WTF? I KNOW he has to know where Lincoln Center is even if he IS a moron---at this point I dont know what the heck is going on)

Me: Lincoln Center is in the Upper West Side ( I attached a map- I cant believe I am attaching a map to give to a realtor of a city I dont live in, but one that he makes his money in based on real estate)

Realtor: She'd take the cross town bus, you'd take the downtown 4,5 express.

Me: (in disbelief)- Well thank you, that was helpful, but what I was really asking was if you could suggest a neighborhood to look in for apartments that would be between to the 2 schools.

Realtor: You'd have to live those lifestyles to figure it out. I am about as clueless as you are. When you are in town, call me and I can show you some apartments.

HAHAHHAHA-- Did this conversation actually just happen? Does he honestly think I am going to call a realtor that didnt even know where Lincoln Center was?

Oh man- I hope they all aren't like this. Any of you New Yorkers have a suggestion as far as location to look?

OH MY GOD

I WAS ACCEPTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

New York City here I come!

Thank GOD!

Ok, so I'm a sneaky little terd

Ok so all of you know about my whole Fordham drama going on and how I am still waiting to get a letter. Well, I was thinking this morning that maybe I could write an email to the guy that interviewed me and was helping me in this whole process. In the email, since my letter was mailed 10 days ago, I would think that HE would think I would know by now. So I was going to play it coy and just say thanks for all his help and that I am so glad the admissions process is finally over---but very clear to not mention whether or not I got my letter. Then I added that if we "ever meet" that I would take him to lunch for all of his help. So I did all of this hoping that he would return my email saying "Oh im so glad its over for you too, congratulations and we will see you this fall!" and then I would know I was in.

So I sent my 3 line email.

I just now received a response:

Laura,

No worries at all.....happy to help in anyway that I can.

If you're planning to visit in the next couple of months and want to take a walk around campus, have any other questions, etc....just let me know.

Best,

(fordham guy)


Ok- so whats your take on that email?? He would know if I was accepted or not right? Even if he wasnt making the final decision? If he didnt know if I was in would he really take the chance of mentioning visiting the school? Ok so maybe I am just too positive for my own good, but this email made me happy.

What do you think? If I am being jaded, all brutal honesty is openly accepted :)

BINGO!

Well this past weekend I did what every 24 year old girl does on a Saturday night- I worked the church bingo. Yea, my sister Lisa and I got roped into "volunteering" there in place of my dad who was originally signed up to do it- but since we are such good children, we gave him a break and went instead. I wouldn't have minded this so much when it was first suggested if it wasnt 4 hours long- but we went along our merry way anyway. Well when we got there the night took a turn for the interesting when we saw a completely HOT guy that was going to be working with us. Lisa went up to him and gave him a hug and then he asked me how I was doing- all the while I was thinking "who the hell is this?" and "holy crap you are hot". Well it turned out he was a guy from Lisa's class back when they went to grade school together. I hadnt even recognized him and I had known him and his family very well when we were all younger. It is amazing how some people change, even though he was always one of those little boys that you just know is going to be good looking when he is older. So that definitely made the night more fun.

Lisa and I were kind of freaked when we first got there. Some of these bingo players are hard core and will get real pissed if you interrupt their game. For instance- here are a few things we encountered:

- many, many little "good luck" items such as trolls, pictures, you name it

- some really fiesty old ladies telling other ladies to "SHUT UP!!" if they were chatting a little too loud

-people getting pissy if you gave them popcorn when they didnt want it

-some lady asking me why the church isnt giving out flowers after the masses this Sunday....umm do I have "church administration" on my forehead?

-the bingo announcer telling me he wants to train me to "call the numbers" --haha yea right they would rip me apart

All in all, it wasnt a bad night at all, except for leaving the church hall smelling like chili dogs and coffee. It made made me feel good to do something like that and a little guilty for kind of whining about it before we left. But the little old bingo ladies who looked at us like we were just the best girls in the world for volunteering..well that made those 4 hours well worth it.

I'm not bitter

I'm starting to think this is all some test. A test to see exactly how long I can wait to get this damn Fordham letter before I go completely mental. This Monday it will be 13 weeks. I am almost to the point where I just insanely laugh at my mailbox everyday that it isn't there. I reconfirmed yesterday with the Admissions office that it was mailed April 30th. So what the heck then? Does it really take a week for a letter to get from NYC to Orlando? I'm getting all of my other mail, so I cant blame the post office. I'm left with no options other than to sit and let the madness and frustration consume me. I was going to leave straight from work today back to Melbourne for Mother's Day, but now I have to drive all the way back to my apartment first to check my damn mail. I swear if its not there the nearest person in grabbing distance is going to lose a limb.

Muppets Take Manhattan

"The Olsen Twins turn 18 next month!"---

Are you kidding me? Are we that desperate for any kind of news that we have to write articles about these two muppet's birthdays that wont even happen for another month? Who really cares anyways? From the articles I was reading, the whole hype is about all the millions of highschool and frat boys who have been waiting so long for them to turn 18. But why? Well obviously they are "legal" then, but what do all these boys expect? If they think that as the clock strikes midnight on their birthday that they are magically going to become whores and open their doors to the men of Manhattan just because they can, well sorry to burst your bubble, but thats not going to happen. They are going to be just as unattainable as they are right now, whether 18 or 30.

Personally, Ive never understood the whole obsession with them to start. Sure they are cute, but in a weird muppet/alien looking sort of way. Ive seen many regular girls who I think are prettier. Is it because they are twins? This is also another phenomenon that I am yet to understand. What is the obsession guys have with twins? Is it the raunchy thought of the possibility of being in the middle of a twin sandwich? Nevermind, I dont want to know.

I guess if they just did something I respected, maybe I would like them more, but that New York Minute movie- barf- just in the commercials you can see there are zero acting skills present, which is strange because they did use to be good child actors. Plus I find it hard to respect two girls that everywhere they go they have to hold hands, yet get upset when they are defined as one entity. Detach yourselves then! Oh and I love how they are always held to such high acclaim for their "empire" and how much money they have made. I think that their managers and publicists probably have a tad more to do with all that than they do. Although, this New York Minute movie has "their idea" written all over it.

Mary-Kate: Hey sis, lets make a movie or something!

Ashley:Oh we soo should! Lets make it about us running all around New York city in cute outfits and lets make there be hot guys in it too that are freaked out because we are twins!

Mary-Kate: Wow, what a great idea! Lets hold hands and skip down to tell our manager!

"We got the same thing"

Maybe its just me, but does anyone find the new Burger King commercials as enjoyable as I do?
They are really quite funny and I haven't gotten tired of them yet- which says a lot since commercials get old fast and I am pretty quick to dump on bad ones. Its a nice break from the "bah bah bah BAH bah" and all of the other tired fast food commercials that are now employing hip hop and teenagers running around eating their products. Gay.

Finally there are fast food commercials that you dont have to think about- and they're funny. Nice work Burger King.

Sasser-ific

Ok apparently I am getting a lot of hits due to my posting of the "sasserworm" virus. I guess since I put the 2 words together, when they search for "sasserworm patch" or anything similar, they are getting my site.

Here people, this is what you need:
http://www.microsoft.com/security/incident/sasser.asp

You want a piece of me? You got itttttt!!!

I forgot to mention in Monday's post how good the Seinfeld show was this past Saturday. He was really hilarious, as always, and I also got to see Carol Leifer, a comic/writer/producer and the real life inspiration for Seinfeld's "Elaine"- and since Elaine is pretty much my idol- that was pretty cool.

The one thing I didn't enjoy about the night was that there were actually hecklers in the crowd. Ive been to stand-up shows before, and there are always one or two- but I guess I just never expected anyone to do it to Jerry. This lady in the front row would just spurt out these random things during his act like "youve got no idea Jerry!!!" and other stupid things like that, completely interrupting what Jerry was saying. What amazes me is how comedians can keep their cool and not lose their place. He eventually had to tell her to "shut up" and after that she was pretty much done. There was also this other guy in the upper bowl section that would just yell out random stuff, but REALLY yell out. Jerry was asked right before he left to do a "hello Neuman"...so as he was preparing for it and just about to open his mouth, the dumbass from the upper bowl yells out "Helllooooo Neuman!!!!!" in an effort to drown out Seinfeld's voice. Well lucky for him, Jerry had hesitated before delivering the catch phrase and we were all able to hear him say it. If that guy would have ruined it for all of us I would have been more than willing to join the group that would jump him in the parking lot.

Ponderings

Things I still don't understand

*Some people's fascination with lawn ornaments. Why can't anyone just have ONE and not 300?

*Why "Charmed" is still on the air

*Why people get so wrapped up in politics thinking they know everything that goes on and why the President makes certain decisions. We don't know shit, so get off your high horse.

*How people can actually sue fast-food chains, blaming them for their obesity.

*How someone can sit through an episode of Seinfeld and not laugh. I've seen it happen.

*The obsession some have with stuffed animals in the back window of their car. These arent cute little Hallmark animals either, these are the nappy, cheap stuffed animals that you get out of that claw machine. Why do people put them there? Is it possible that they think it looks nice?

*Why skinny people always think they are fat.

*How walking through a museum is torture to some people.

*How anyone can eat cottage cheese as a snack. You know it isn't good. Stop faking.

*How some people think that dogs dont have feelings.

*And finally- you guessed it- how it can now be 11 weeks and 1 day since my application was in and I still don't have a letter. Yep.

He got me

*Well it has been a funfilled sasserworm morning. Why is it that when a virus is out and spreading like wildfire everyone becomes either a wannabe IT genius or a 5 year old child? About an hour after we all logged in this morning we were all greeted with the lovely "your system will be shutting down in 50 seconds" box. I had seen this before and I knew it was a virus, however, people in here were going nuts. Keep in mind that I am the only IT person in a marketing department. I had to laugh as I hear all these people throughout the hallways "wow whats going on??" or "oh my god its shutting down again!!" - "I thought this is what our antivirus software is suppose to prevent!!". Yea well I laughed too soon because before I knew it there was a little line outside my cubicle asking my "techie" advice. What do they think I am, the gatekeeper of all virus patches? Has no one ever heard of www.windowsupdate.microsoft.com? Well, since I am such a wonderfully nice girl, I helped anyone who needed it by simply finding the patch and installing it. So I am once again hailed by them as some computer genius when all I did was something most 10yr olds can now do.

*So what is it about hunger that make people go nuts? I'm not sure, but I was reminded by how crazy people can be when I went to go heat up my lunch this afternoon. We have 2 microwaves on the whole floor, which everyone shares to heat up their food. There is the white one, which is the crappy one and you have to add on about 4 minutes to the time it would take a normal microwave to cook our food thoroughly. Then there is the coveted black one--this one is the new one that everyone tries to get to first. So anyways, I walk into the kitchen, go to the fridge to grab my lunch and then proceed across the room to the black microwave which is luckily not in use----then I hear her. From around the corner, like we were in some football game, comes this lady sprinting, with lean cusine in hand, towards the black microwave. She of course gets there waaay before me, considering I am not a nutbar and am simply WALKING to the micro. She then pops her food in, punches 7 minutes into the timer, and then looking very pleased with herself, exists out the other door. Lucky for her that other micro was available or else it would have been go time.

PS- If my letter was mailed on Friday, it could be here today. Cross your fingers.

Cue the anxiety

*I just got off the phone with Fordham and for once, was given a different answer. I was told a decision HAS been made and will be mailed out today. Glory Glory Hallelujah! So I am guessing from Nyc to Orlando, maybe I will get it Monday or Tuesday- perfectly marking the 11th week I've been waiting since I submitted my application. Now I am actually kind of regretful that you all know about this because if I dont get in that would be a really sucky post. Thank god I will be home for the whole weekend--far far away from my mailbox.

*Alright. Enough is enough. Today again, like many times before, I was in an elevator with a terribly good looking guy with absolutely nothing to say to him. I am definitely flirting impaired. I dont understand how some people do it, but when I try I feel like it "looks" like I am trying. All I had to say is "that's a nice suit", or any other sentence in the english language. I dont know why i get so intimidated. Next time I am in the situation and I dont say something, I'm going to have to start putting $5 in a jar or something, maybe that way I will learn to get some balls.

*Anyone who was concerned about the dog that I mentioned in a previous post that a neighbor kept tied up outside my building, will be happy to know that he was outside yesterday with a new and longer leash, woohoo!

*Oh Great- If someone searches for "Lindsay Lohan Haircolor" on google.com- my site comes up on the first page. I never liked this girl to start with, but after seeing her "Diary" on MTV- it was confirmed that she is a full-fledged snot.

Ok, I admit It

I'm a height snob. There is just no getting around it. So there it is.

I was reading this article yesterday on why girls are passing up shorter guys and it was somewhat intriguing since I have been told by pretty much everyone that I am too picky with guys- especially with height, blah blah. Well I am 5'1- so I know that a 5'10 guy should suffice, but fact of the matter is, it hasn't so far. Its not that I would immediately rule out a shorter guy, but its almost like as soon as I see them or am told they are short- its seems there is a strike against them already. I know, I'm retarded. It doesnt help that my best friend agrees with me either. She is a little shorter than I am and we are both stuck on taller guys- always have been. I think its the whole "basketball player" thing. Ive always liked that physique. I'd pick skinny and toned over shorter and muscular anyday. So anyways- back to the article. They were saying to stop being so snooty about shorter guys because apparently "thats where the power is". Riggght. "Many of these guys are buff and tend to be a lot more muscular than those scrawny streetlamps you've been dating". What if I want a streetlamp? Whats the big deal? I know I am being stupid and superficial, but I cant help what I am attracted to. Maybe I just haven't met a good looking shorter guy that has interested me. I think I have to blame my friends partially for this because for the past 4 years my two closest guy friends have been 6'3 and 6'5. Any guy that stood next to them just didn't seem like a "man"- just seemed like boys (oh god I think I can hear their heads inflating). Its not that I need someone to "take care of me " and "protect me"- Im not sure what it is. I guess its like asking you why you prefer blondes/brunettes- I dont know, you just do.

PS- I emailed the lady back to be nice and asked if maybe she could tell me a little about him. She emailed me back with:

Sure He is 28 about 5' 8 dark hair works at Suntrust Bank as Tech- Very good looking sweet and fun to be around. He is from Ohio he has been here for about 5 or six not sure exactly how long . I can probably get him to send me a picture of him and can you give me some info about you so I can pass to him . Talk to you soon .

This lady is super nice but can't correspond worth a shit. "Hes been here for 5 or 6 "what? Months? Weeks? Years? The fact that he's a "tech" doesnt bode too well either- since I KNOW what 95% of tech guys look like- and its isnt pretty. And I'm sure you noticed he's 5'8. Super.

Dating for Dummies

As if I needed one more weird/uncertain/random thing in my life, now I have to somehow respond to this:

Hello

I don't know if you remember me I showed you my in-laws sofa.I know we just met and you don't have to answer if you don't want . I was wondering if you are dating anyone or if you where looking to date anyone. The reason I ask I have a friend of mine I would like to help him fine someone because he is such a cute, sweet and wonderful guy. And he has been looking for a while. Hope to talk to you soon


Yea. So there is the board at work for people selling stuff and this lady was on it selling her inlaws couch. So a few weeks ago I went and met the lady to look at the couch. Long story short - I didn't buy the couch and I thought I would never see/hear from her again (we work in different buildings). Then I get this email. I guess I should be flattered or whatever, but I am drawing a complete blank as to how to respond. I'm not seeing anyone right now, and to be honest I dont know if Im all that interested in dating anyone- I was just planning on a drunken summer with my friends. Ok ok, Im ahead of myself again. How should I respond? Should I really just not take the chance that this could be a really great guy? I mean with my luck, he is probably gross, or if hes not gross he's some kind of nut- (flashback to Bulgarian dude who just talked about getting drunk 24/7)- oh yea, there have been some winners. The "looking for a while" part of the letter kind of freaks me out because I have never been one to go out searching for Mr. Right, nor do I think that a man would "complete me" and all that nonsense. Has this guy been actively searching with no luck or is this just a wording mistake on her part?

So I dont know. Ive never been a fan of the blind date idea- but I'm almost 25 and I'm starting to think I may not have the luxury of passing up the possibility of a "cute, sweet, wonderful" guy. ugh- no clue what to do. Ideas?

Maybe Today, We Can Put the Past Away

I haven't checked the mail since mid last week and I probably won't for a few more days. Somehow it makes me feel like I have the upper hand.

There is an apartment in my building thats on the ground floor facing the parking lot. The people that live there have this dog that is seriously sooo gorgeous, almost looks like a big stuffed animal. Anyways, they have been leaving him tied up on their patio quite often, which is fine, because their porch doesnt have a screen and I know dogs enjoy being outside. The thing that pisses me off is that they have him tied up with the shortest leash ever and its tied to the handle on the sliding glass door, which is kind of high above his head. The leash is so short that the dog cant even lie down, he has to sit straight up the whole time. I know there isnt really anything I can do about this but it really pisses me off because he looks so uncomfortable. Ive seriously considered buying a longer leash from Petsmart and leaving it on their patio. I wonder if it would do any good.

Anyone have a cd that is pretty old yet you constantly listen to it because it just makes you feel so good? For me that cd is Third Eye Blind's first album. I don't know why but when that cd is playing, all is well with the world.

C'est La Vie

After work I got a new haircut complete with a new haircolor so I'm feeling sassy and good. I'm done whining about school and I'm just going to enjoy the weekend, which shouldn't be hard since we are going to be having perfect weather.

When problems can be solved with some hairdye and a bottle of wine, life is good.

We Built this list on a bunch of craaaapppp

Ok, so I'm feeling it today. I think this is it. Even though my horoscope says tomorrow is my day "of great relief" I'm hoping that its really today. Now I get to sit here until 5 oclock wondering and then have my usual moment of cardiac arrest as I open the mailbox. Cross your fingers.

I somehow managed to set my alarm clock to wake me up with the Disney radio station. I didnt even know they had one. So every morning I wake up to either Hillary Duff, Mandy Moore, or Lindsay Lohan. I keep forgetting to change it and now I am actually starting to like it. I guess there's just something refreshing about innocent lyrics and singers who actually wear clothes in their videos.

I'm sure by now you've all read something on Blender magazine's "50 worst songs ever". Well Blender named the #1 worst song ever "We Built this City". I have to admit it is definitely not one of the best or brightest songs, but "worst song ever" seems a little harsh. Blender described the song as "the truly horrible sound of a band taking the corporate dollar while sneering at those who take the corporate dollar." Yea, but so what? It was the 80's- what happened to music just making you feel good and that being enough? I do agree that there are many bands out there with witty lyrics and brilliance all around, but sometimes you just want something that feels right, even if the lyrics are dumb. Why aren't there more rap songs listed? God knows there are some dumbass lyrics there. Is Britney Spears really not on the list? I mean if we are all getting picky about lyrics, she is a prime contender. I didn't get to view the full list yet, but from what I saw they were on the right track with some songs. I do disagree with a few though. Whitney Houston's "Greatest Love of All" is listed as #22 on the list. Whaaa? That song kicked ass and anyone who was musically inclined in the 80's has to agree that it doesnt belong on a worst songs ever list. Oh, and "The Sounds of Silence" by Simon and Garfunkle?? Please. Their reasoning behind this one is due to a "self important line"--ooOOoooh. God knows no other songs have ever included those. I started to think about what I would have listed as the worst songs ever and it was harder than I thought.

Ok, totally lost my train of thought because some guy in Japan starting im'ing me.

I'll start this list of bad songs off and you fill in the rest...

- "Ladies" by some girl named Sarai- the epitomy of a slutty white girl rapper song
- "How do you talk to an Angel"- by that Jamie Walters fellow
-"Together Forever"- Rick Astley---well lets just say anything by Rick Astley

Someone in this office smells like catfood

Last night while Lisa and I were watching The Real World she got a call on her cell with a number she didnt recognize, but answered it anyways. It turned out to be someone looking for me (I had given her my old cell). Well anyways this someone turned out to be my highschool boyfriend's best friend who I havent talked to, well since highschool. He had apparently just gotten off the phone with my ex and wanted to see how I was. Random.

I have now had the same freaky dream twice since I moved into my new apartment, but hopefully after writing about it now I wont. The dream just kind of starts by my mom waking me up so that I can come see something. She then takes me to this door in my apartment that I had never seen before that leads to an extra bathroom. Cool right? Well maybe if the bathroom didnt have blood stains all over the walls. Yeah. We stand there for a second in the bathroom thinking "oh my god" and then I wake up. Ive had the dream twice and the only difference there has been was that the first time it was my dad and the second time it was my mom. Im not a nutcase at all and have no idea why I am having this dream- but its pretty creepy.

Someone else besides me has finally seen a gator in the lake behind my apartment. For some reason everytime I mention any kind of story involving gators no one seems to believe me. Anyways, the gator which had to have been around 5ft was just swimming around minding his own business. Oh and by the way, for anyone who has heard the story of Ann and I encountering a gator in our old neighborhood, its 100% true.

No letter from Fordham yesterday. Maybe today is the day.

If only I had the money to waste...

Every year more and more gadgets come out on the market, some of which are pretty gay and just excuses for rich people to spend their money on crap and others are actually pretty cool.

I was reading an article on bathroom gadgets and it made me think about how use to our most current advances I am. When I am at an airport, restaurant, hotel, etc it almost seems like second nature to expect that when I get up, the toilet will flush itself; when I place my hands under the faucet, the water will start to run....and now I am kind of getting use to those new soap squirters that you just put your hands under and it squirts out the soap, you know, because pumping would be too hard.

Well now it looks like all of these things are being made available to you in the comfort of your very own bathroom at home, of course if you have the dollars to back it up.

Double Head Shower- Who wants one head when you can have 2? Especially when they rotate and alternate pulsating spray patterns. Are we still talking shower heads?

Automatic Bath- Since standing by the tub waiting for it to fill to your desired level leaves much to be desired, they've invented this little gadget that allows you to program favorite temperatures for up to 3 family members, as well as letting you program the amount of tub that you want filled. I dont know about you, but this doesnt seem too "new". I could have sworn thay had this in that movie "Jennifer 8" and that was back in 1992.

The Self Serve Toilet- This toilet does more things than I would ever expect or want a toilet to do. This magic toilet includes "gentle front-and-back aerated spray; oscillating spray massage, a heated seat, automatic deodorizer and warm drying make hygiene high-tech. Approach and the lid automatically opens. Stand there and the seat rises, too. When you leave, it automatically flushes and the lid closes".

Dual-Purpose Television Mirror- Now this is by far my favorite because its practical. It's a mirror that also has a 13-inch LCD television in it. Yea. How awesome is that? When the screen is off it just looks like a regular mirror. I dont know about guys, but for girls that have to blow dry their hair forever, do their makeup, etc...this is so perfect. It can also be intergrated with with cable, satellite and DVD players. Genius.

All Moved In - Thank God

Well Saturday felt like the longest day of my life, but thankfully I am now completely moved in to my new apartment. I had movers come and do all the real heavy stuff, but even moving just minor things turned out to be much more than I expected. Where did I get so much crap? I threw away like 7 bags of stuff before I even moved and I still had box after box. My entire body is still incredibly sore and my calve muscles feel like they are going to bust through my skin. I was thinking that while I thought I was in pretty good shape, I must not be if I am this dead feeling still, but then I realized I was moving stuff non-stop from 9:30am until 7:30pm with maybe a 30 min break to eat. That adds up bigtime, especially when you have to go from a 2nd floor apt to another 2nd floor apt. I still have to go back and clean my bathroom and stuff in the old place, which I am dreading, but I think I'll leave that to the very last minute.

I spoke to Fordham on Friday and they said that a decision will be made and sent out by Monday (today) at the latest. So my letter could very well be on its way to me at this very moment. Since this week could be life changing for me I decided to look at my horoscope for today and this is part of what I read:
"The next ten days promise to be major milestones in your personal history. Just imagine what you can do next. Friday brings a sense of freedom and relief."

Interesting.

The more I think about this summer the more I just can't wait for it to come. I'm not really sure why because it's not like I won't have to work. I guess since I know at least 2 of my good friends will be back it gives me hope for nights out like the good old college days.
Right now I wish I was laying by the pool sipping a peach daiquiri. Guess I'll have to settle for a peach smoothie and my desk chair. Could be worse.

Ummm, when did Hanson get hot?

Ok this is something I never would have guessed I would be blogging about, but I saw Hanson perform on Good Morning America today and I couldn't believe how much they had changed. Especially the youngest brother...he doesnt even look like the same kid. I was never a fan of Hanson, but my younger sister Lisa was in looooooove with Taylor Hanson and was a complete Hanson freak. I guess some of their old music was catchy in a weird sort of way, but I thought they all looked groty. Well even thought they haven't completely changed in looks, they look about 100 times better. The oldest brother who I use to think looked hideous actually looked cute on the show this morning....weird.

So anyways, the song requested for them to sing this morning was of course "Mmm bop" so I immediately was about to change the channel because I have heard that song waaay too many times. To my surprise, it was a different version of the song, much more mature sounding, I actually liked it. They also played a song off of their new album and it was pretty good. What is happening? Have I come to stage in my life in which I find it ok to buy a Hanson cd? Ehh, I dont think so. Kudos to their stylist and wardrobe people though, you've worked wonders.

stupid slut bimbos

You've got to be kidding me.


Everytime women make any advancement in the world, there are always some stupid slut bimbos there to take us right back to where we were.

Be interactive, it won't kill you.

Ok so I saw this on another site and thought it might be neat to see what you all came up with. I kind of reworked it so here you go.

Name the song(s)/artist(s) that first comes into your head after the following descriptions. I'll go first.

*Reminds you of your youth..
If we are talking elementary youth then- Paula Abdul and C&C Music Factory
If we are talking highschool youth then- Fugees, Sublime, Bush, Snoop

*You love singing along to...
Pretty much everything, but especially- Dashboard, Michelle Branch, Third Eye Blind

*Makes you so annoyed you turn it off...
too much Britney, that stupid milkshake song, "you're the best"-karate kid soundtrack...

*Makes you want to dance...
Jay-Z, Outkast, "Cowboys-ish" songs- those of you who know, know.

*Your parents made you listen to...
The Beatles, Simon & Garfunkle, Jimi Hendrix, Hall & Oates, Phil Collins, Van Morrison, Lynrd Skynyrd, Tom Petty..

*Reminds you of a great time...
anything from the 80's-- childhood rocked

*No one would ever guess you liked listening to...
Otis Redding, Smashing Pumpkins, Tim Mcgraw

Get your praise on

Apparently there is this growing trend of Christian nightclubs that I never knew about. Devout Christians apparently flock to these non-alcoholic clubs to enjoy Christian rock performances most oftenly accompanied by gospel presentations.

The article I read said that one of the most well known of these clubs is "Club 3 Degrees" in Minneapolis. By the description of the place it sounded not too bad. Its a 3 level club where people can shoot pool and enjoy pizza and smoothies. "The closest thing to a stimulant served is Red Bull". Is it me or does it sound like a skating rink- minus the skating? I guess the only difference are the rules, "no mosh pits, no slow songs, no secular cover tunes. Bands must play Christian-themed music and share their faith onstage".

I don't really have an opinion on this since I've never been to a Christian club, but the thought of being in a "club" type atmosphere without alcohol is completely foreign to me. I know "you dont have to drink to have fun" has always been the anthem of soberites, and I agree to a point. I think its one of those things that if you never drink when you go out then its fine, but if you always drink when you went out and then you all of the suddent try to go out "Christian style"- it sucks. I think its just always been one of those procedure-oriented things with my friends and I. You go to a club, you have a drink- thats just what you do. Now if you are a moron and just go to clubs to get wasted and then act like an idiot, thats a whole different story.

Also, I must note since I am aware that there are some of my blog readers that are 15 and below-- I was never "drunk" until the summer AFTER my 21st birthday. I had a great time in highschool without the use of any drugs or alcohol, so don't be stupid and try to act older than you really are...you'll have plenty of time for that later.

I'm not at work and you are

So I made my weekly call to Fordham today and the story of the moment is:
"We expect a decision sometime this week". Sure you do. What's taking so long? I dont have any experience in applying to B-schools, but I would think that they would have made a decision 5 weeks after my interview. I guess Im thinking of it more as them sitting there deliberating whether or not I am getting in, when in all actuality my file is probably just sitting in some stack of 500 files waiting to be gone through.

On a brighter note, I'm off work today, woohoo! I went in this morning and when I tried to pass through security my ID card didnt clear. So I didnt think much of it, but when I tried to log in to the network and I got "access denied" then I knew something was up. All of the sudden I flash 100 thoughts in my head thinking, oh my god, what if they found the blog, or what if Im browsing too many sites, etc, etc. Well it turns out that my old contractor end date was somehow never removed from the system so it has me as no longer with the company. The people that need to rectify this are based in Cali so they wouldnt even be in until around 12 our time. So my boss said to just take a paid day off. Fine by me!

Now there is a battle going on in my head between Productive Laura and Lazy Laura. PL wants to get some packing done now, run some errands, go the gym, and clean the apartment. However, LL wants to just rent a movie and order in lunch. Ehh, I dont know.

Every night when I pack up more of my apartment it leads to a whole new series of findings which always ends up with me just sprawled out on the floor reminiscing rather than packing. For instance, heres some stuff I found last night:

-an old highschool project on "Great Expectations" - dont ask why I saved it, who knows
-Brandon's ratty old sleeping bag
-Brian's social security number
-a vhs tape that I had never seen of my trip to Europe in 2000 -that was about 2 hr detour from packing
-rules on how to play the Cosby drinking game
-the September 11th issue of the Orlando Sentinel
-freaking 800,000 mardi gras beads
- 2 cans of beta fish food- I dont have a fish
-and of course the old computer game "F-18 No Fly Zone" on a floppy disk- yea i said "floppy"

I wonder what tonights dig will uncover.

Easter Greetings

So with Easter coming up this weekend I can't help but recall my Easters from the past and what a big deal they were when my sisters and I were growing up. We would all try to go to bed early, Christmas Eve style, in anticipation of the next morning. I remember one Easter, I must have been like 7, I was really sick. I had about a 102 temp and woke up in the middle of the night swearing I saw the Easter Bunny outside my window. The weird thing was, I did. Was it a hallucination due to the fever? Yes. Did I understand that at the time? No. So long story short, I saw the Easter Bunny outside my window and then got so scared I threw up. Happy Easter to me.

When my sisters and I got older the festivities grew. It was like clockwork every year. I was up at 7 am, and would then wake up Lisa and Leah. Most of the time a rambunctious Lisa or Leah would awaken my parents. We would then search the whole house for our Easter baskets. My dad always did a really good job hiding them and really got a kick out of making mine impossible to find. After getting back from church later in the morning we would come home and have our easter egg hunt. Now this started out as no big deal, just me and my sisters, but eventually turned in to something other friends and families would join in on. Lisa always took the hunt so seriously, pushing by little 2 yr old Leah who was about to find her first egg and yelling at my mom for giving hints-- "youre not suppose to be hunting!!!". Oh yea, we've got it on film. Priceless.

Now, we still celebrate and all, but its just different. No more hunt for easter baskets, I think last year they were on the dining table when we woke up. We still try to do the easter egg hunt, and color eggs and all that just for fun. Well I guess its not THAT different then.

I guess whats really important no matter how old you are, is to never lose your childish enthusiasm, even for the little things. I think I've got that covered.

Happy Easter :)

Words can't describe how much I want to hurt this guy

GIVE HIM THE CHAIR...TWICE

Production Rate= 0

Today so far is one of those days that I have a lot of work to do, but I dont feel like doing any of it. So far this morning all I have done (minus the occassional work emails going in and out) is:

-correspond regarding a couch I am going to buy
-correspond regarding coffee tables I WAS going to buy-"little"scratch my ass
-checked a few sites for ipods
-chatted with a few friends
-checked Uhaul rates for my trip...in August

I blame this lack of work concentration on Fordham. I called yesterday and a different lady answered so I thought it might be my lucky day. She came back to the phone after a brief pause and sounding all happy said, "Ok Laura! You are pending!". I couldnt help but laugh and then want to bash the computer in. It's been almost 5 weeks since my interview, not since I submitted my app, just since my interview. WHAT THE FUCK. Honestly, does it really take this long? Is this just possibly some kind of conspiracy to see how long it takes before my head blows up?

Everything has just been a pain lately. Ive been trying to buy a couch for my new place im moving into and its really been an annoyance. Why cant people just tell the truth? "oh yea they have only had the couch for a few months"--but when I get there to look at it, a "few months" turns into a "few years". Then I am looking at buying this other couch and I ask the guy if there is visible wear on the cushions and he responds by saying "the couch really is in good condition, I think". What the heck? If its torn up just freaking tell me and stop wasting my time.

Im hoping that with all this building tension of having to move and buy new stuff, and hire movers, and waiting on Fordham....that as these things happen the stress will subside. I sure hope so.

My dad leaves for The Masters today, that lucky duck. I remember going a few times when I was younger and it was so exciting. For some reason I remember really liking Corey Pavin, lol, who knows why. Nowadays, who can focus on skill when there are hotties like Adam Scott on the green.

Lunchtime. Woo, that was one busy morning. I know I'll be sorry in a few hours when I am slammed.

Well we have greed covered. On to the next sin.

Well isn't life just grand? I'm sure J-Lo's mom thinks so since she won a 2.4 million dollar jackpot this past weekend playing $1 slots in Atlantic City. How the heck is that fair? Her daughter is a mulit-millionaire and probably one of the most famous people in the world, yet oh no, thats not enough, lets give the family a couple million more. I dont think rich people should be allowed to win such large amounts of money. There should be some kind of cap. Or if they do win it, they have to donate a certain percentage. I wonder how many really rich people play the lotto still. That truck driver that recently won like $240 million has been playing the lottery for 35 yrs, or something like that, and in his press interview stated how on his way home he was going to stop and get another ticket- and he was serious. Greedy much?

I was also reading somewhere a few days ago about the richest women in the U.S. Every single one of the "top ten" cite the source of wealth as "inheritance". Well whoopidy doo. You didnt do shit! I was pretty disappointed that not even one of them had brought about their own wealth. What does that say about us women? Well I dont really care about it that much to go off on that tangent. Just something to think about.

I have a really weird craving for this.

Wah

You know what sucks? I think I am getting sick. My stupid throat is all swollen feeling.

I move in 2 weeks and am not looking forward to all the joy that comes with moving. Especially when I'll be moving again in August to NYC. What a pain.

2 Black cats ran in front of my car yesterday. Coincidence?

My current pet peeve, that really drives me crazy:
People with the AIM Expressions that have music clips play when they send an instant message. STOP IT. You make me want to rip my ears off.

Thats all. Time for my miracle drug...Dimetapp.

This day ROCCCKKKSS!

So when I woke up this morning and then when I was driving to work, I just had this wonderful "what a great day" feeling....for absolutely no reason. Like one of those days where your hair isn't a pain in the ass, and your clothes look good on you...I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. Anyways, this day has only gotten better. I got major kudos on this HUGE conference call with all these bigwigs listening -for my work on our intranet site- and then I got a big round of applause from my co-workers. So that was great but then it started to make me feel sad that I was in so good with such a good company...and that I might be leaving here to go to school in NYC. Well I was talking about this with my mom and she mentioned that she was talking to her boss yesterday (I also worked for him in highschool)...and she was saying how that even if I didnt get into Fordham that I was thinking of moving anyways-which scared her because I would leave my job for nothing. Well he said that if that turned out to be the case, that he would try and get me a job at the New York Stock Exchange! I would take this with a grain of salt normally, but he had gotten his daughter a summer job there a year or so ago and he is pretty well known in his company...so its definitely in his reach. SCORE!
To top it all off I get to see my little puppy tonight. Man the day is only half over and I can't stop smiling. Have a great weekend!

Fiddle Faddle

Well, I've got nothin.

So why am I posting and wasting your time you ask? Well because its my blog and you're not the boss of me.

I was looking through some of my old journals last night, reading old entries is always interesting. Well halfway through one of them this folded up letter falls out. It turns out to be an 8 page letter I had written my crush at that time. Man I can't even believe how pathetic it was...I got a little nauseaus seeing how naive I had been and how I stated numerous times that I was "over him" in the letter blah blah blah---when I clearly remember that I wasn't. How dumb. Anyways, I started to wonder why I had never delivered this letter that I obviously put so much effort into. So I started reading back in the journal....when I came upon an entry dated the day after I had written the letter. Well apparently the night that I wrote the letter, I had also managed to hook up with the guy again--therefore making the letter complete crap. Man sometimes I amaze myself. Thank god I am past all that bullshit now.

I think the dress I wore to work today is too short for the "office environment". Its not like "ass cheeks are viewable from behind" short, but when everyone else here seems to wear turtleneck bodysuits, it probably does stand out. Screw it, that cute guy in Events seemed extra happy to see me, mission accomplished.

PS-- what the hell is this ? I mean I love Jerry Seinfeld, but when he starts being an internet pop-up....well I just dont know.

This is our daughter Laura...and this is our other daughter, Laura's sister

I came across an article on MSN that was talking about "birth order myths" and I thought it was pretty interesting. While they said that birth order isn't a definite predictor of success, happiness, etc... they did say that each birth order spot had some glaring personalities.

If you're the oldest, you're probably:

* Most likely to succeed

* Most conscientious and reliable

* Conservative

* Self-critical

* A perfectionist

* Able to enjoy the company of older people

* The link between your parents and siblings

In addition, oldest children are:

* Seldom allowed to be just kids--their parents continually push them ahead and expect the most from them

* Often dethroned by younger siblings

* Convinced their siblings will outshine them

If you're the middle child, you're probably:

* A compromiser and negotiator

* The silent rebel against the family's values

* The one with the most friends, an effective team player

* Reticent, but dream of being catapulted to greatness

* Part of the woodwork, unless finally given a position of outright command

Middle children are also:

* Well aware they are frequently bypassed and upstaged by older or younger sibs

* Often eager to carve out a unique spot in the family, whether positive or negative

* Likely to be compelled to move away from the family to establish a secure spot among their peers.

If you're the youngest child, you're probably:

* Compelled to make a contribution to the world

* A show-off who enjoys the limelight

* Both a charmer and a rebel--endearing one minute, hard to deal with the next.

* Often the family clown.

* Creative.

Youngest children are also:

* Often stuck doubting the validity of their perceptions because they were often laughed at or not taken seriously.

* Likely to be compelled to do what the older children haven't.

I have two younger sisters and comparing myself and them to these traits--they seem pretty accurate, except I will never be dethroned.

Call me

I watched that Heidi Fleiss movie last night starring Jamie-Lynn DiScala as Madame Heidi. I had no expectations coming in to this but I thought that Jamie did a pretty good job portraying her. I dont know about anyone else who watched it, but if the goal of this flick was to turn anyone off to the lifestyle of a big time prostitute/madame...I dont think it really worked. I think the movie made the whole thing seem like not that big of a deal and actually pretty glamorous. I know they added in the coke snorting and all that to show some "life going down the tubes" drama, but I think overall it pretty much showed her life being all lollipops and gummy bears. I never really gave Heidi Fleiss a second thought, but I came out of the movie thinking she was kind of badass. Of course what they didnt show was her life in prison in which she described as "going in as Barbie and coming out as G.I. Joe"....but thats probably part of the movie I wouldnt want to see anyways. I think I am still scarred from the prison rape in American History X. As far as this movie being something that USA network can air...they pushed the envelope as far as the sex scenes, but I think it was fun to see Jamie in a slutty role- diversity in acting is good in my book. I'm still surprised that Heidi never "named names". I actually think its pretty cool of her. I can only imagine who's in that little black book.

One acceptance down, one to go

Well congratulations are in order for my best friend Ann who got accepted into NYU's masters program for education, woohoo!!

As for me, you guessed it, I'm still "pending" with Fordham. Well I was as of Friday anyways. I want to call today, but I feel bad enough that those admissions people already know me by name. It's been 3 long weeks since my interview, I guess another week wont kill me.

I feel so much pressure now to get in its crazy. If I go to my mailbox and there is a "small envelope" from Fordham....that scream heard across the U.S.--yep that will be me. I'm actually terrified of that moment. I guess its because I want it so bad.

Ok enough Fordham talk because its starting to make my granola bar come back up.

Did anyone see "Eternal Sunshine...." this weekend? I heard from one person it was really good.

Oh also...I was surprised to hear that three "stars" are now pursuing a music career: Tyra Banks, Paris Hilton, and Jada Pinkett-Smith. Interesting. I can actually see Paris Hilton being a good singer, Tyra Banks though...ehh. I just see her hopping around with her boobs flying out. So I guess thats not much different than our current pop stars, maybe she has a chance yet.

It had to end sometime

Well Tom Cruise and Penelope Cruz have apparently broken up, or did sometime in January. I'm not sure if this is good news or bad news or maybe just "news". I guess maybe its because since they initially started dating, they really haven't been in the limelight much, especially her. However, I think we all know what good this little courtship has done for Nicole Kidman's career. I have to admit, I was definitely more of a fan of hers and less of his during this whole thing. I know Penelope is beautiful and all, but seriously, look at Nicole, she's exquisite, especially in the last two years, I think she has really blossomed again. What's weird to me is that I know a good amount of people who don't even think Nicole Kidman is attractive. My boss saw her in a hotel lobby a few months ago and said she was just amazing looking and her skin was flawless. With Tom and Nicole single again, I can't help but wonder if there is the possibility of them ever being an item again. I'm not sure if I'd want to see Nicole back with him, but then again I can't really imagine her with anyone else.

So I have a question now.
Guys- who are you more attracted to, Nicole or Penelope?
Girls- if you could look like either one of them, who would you choose?

I can't decide- maybe Penelope, I don't know if I would like being as tall as Nicole.

All commercials should star Raoul

Old Navy officially makes the worst commercials EVER. Nothing inspires me to strangle something as much as those stupid people flilly flallying around in their stupid knit pullovers. "Well you boys are a 20" baaaaaaaaaaaarf, and then the stupid faces those twin guys make. Even if I was a desperate actress, an Old Navy commercial would come as a last resort to earn income. I'd rather do one of those std commercials. In my opinion these commercials are reversely effective. I hate them so much I refuse to buy anything Old Navy. The weird thing is, no matter how much I hate these commercials, I am almost compelled to watch them when they come on, even if it's just to stare in utter disbelief.

On a positive note, my most favorite commercial ever is that Gap commercial for the broken-in jeans, starring the sexiest man alive, Raoul Bova. Its the one where he keeps changing his shirt but not his jeans and keeps collapsing onto the bed as they are playing that "tempted by the fruit of another" song. I cant find clips of that commercial anywhere and Gap has taken it down off their site. However, I just saw his new commercial the other day, and he is just, well, I think this clip(tv ads- stressfree khakis) says it all.

Death to trucker hats

Well I read a little comment in a magazine yesterday made by JC Chasez (an Nsync'er turned solo, for those of you who dont know). Anyways, JC was commenting on Clay Aiken and his new album. I can't recall the quote exactly but it went something like "I'm not trying to be down on the guy, but I dont think I can take another Clay Aiken album"--except I think that sounds nicer than what he actually said. I'm not really a fan of the music of either of these two guys, but I do know one thing---if you're own music sucks, you shouldnt be out talking about how bad somebody elses' is. Has anyone heard the lyrics of the new JC songs? They are revolting and I really can't believe that whoever wrote them, is actually getting paid for it. examples:

"So many beautiful young people
That game is lethal, you don't have to kill them though"

and yet another-

"All day long I dream about sex
And all night long I think about sex
And all the time I think about sex with you"


Now Ive heard tons of bad lyrics before, but they are normally coupled with a good beat that distracts you, case in point, Britney. The thing about JC is that the beat sucks, the lyrics suck, and he really just sounds like some horny perv in all his songs. He isnt even cute anymore, what happened? He suddenly went from clean cut pop idol to nasty trucker roadkill. Those trucker hats should all be collected and burned.

This brings me to another thought. Justin Timberlake in movies. I think this could be interesting. His first real movie debut is going to be in "Edison" which is set to come out next year. This could either be really good for him or really bad. I remember watching some cheezy Disney movie with him in it years ago and he was just awful. You know how Chandler on Friends gets when he is suppose to be acting "serious" and it ends up just looking really gay, well thats how he was. Then again, that was a long time ago and he has certainly grown up. Plus with a cast of actors like Morgan Freeman and Kevin Spacey behind you, I would think failure would be a little further out of reach.

The mystery that is my brain

Ok, so lately I've been having really strange dreams that involve celebrities. I know that doesnt sound too odd, but the dreams are somewhat the same to a certain degree....

*they all take place in natural surroundings- a lake, a field, a forest

*they involve celebrities I rarely think about- Matt Damon, Leonardo Dicaprio, David Schwimmer --or really even find that attractive

*in all of these dreams we are a couple, the celebrity and I, and are completely enamored with each other

*we are always running from someone or some group of people, but in a very romantic/scandalous way....not like we are going to be killed or anything

So I cant say I'm upset I'm having these dreams, but it really makes me wonder what causes them, and why these certain people? I can't even remember the last time I even had a thought about Matt Damon, much less "Ross". I think those dream decoder things are a joke....I mean really, how would anyone know what would cause a certain person to dream of a certain thing? When I went through a span in which I only had dreams about alligators (dont ask) I tried looking up what this meant and I was told "Alligators most always symbolize a problem! To be surrounded by one means you have to choose one bad thing to get out of a lot of bad things." What crap, there was nothing going on at the time even remotely close to that.

I think it would be cool to be hypnotized. My friend went to this big show in Vegas and was hypnotized and when she viewed the tape later she couldnt believe it had happened. I was watching the tape with her a few months later and passed out in the middle of when he was "putting them under", and I remember thinking it was so hard to stay awake, even though it wasnt late or anything. They were all convinced that even through the tape I was becoming hypnotized. I think it would be a cool experience, I never really believed in it until I saw how my friend reacted to it. I wonder if all that spiritual weird stuff is real, like tarot cards, mediums, etc. I still am really shocked by the stuff that the palm reader in Soho knew about me. We had just done it for fun, but we all left kind of freaked out. She out of nowhere told my friend that she had been in an abusive relationship for a few years and was now with the right person. She told her that this abusive person came back into her life recently, but just for a moment. The weird part was, she HAD been in an abusive relationship, hadnt heard from the guy in years, was now in a good relationship, and getting engaged, but 2 days earlier had run into the previous guy while out shopping. See...that just doesnt make sense to me, but maybe I'm not suppose to understand it.

Enough already

It's been two weeks since my interview and still "a decision has not been made yet" with regards to my acceptance/denial to Fordham. This is really starting to drive me nuts. I was thinking about it, and this whole MBA journey started back in September of last year. That's 7 months! No wonder it feels like forever, it has been. I'm getting to the point where the whole "new york city dream" occupies much of my day. I constantly talk about it with my friend, who is awaiting a letter from NYU, and suddenly we are talking about what we will do in the winter to stay in shape there--and neither of us even have a clue if we are in or not. I guess Im just sick of being in limbo. I need to plan. Its part of the "nerd me". I can't stand not knowing what state I will be living in 5 months from now. It really doesnt help that I am on a conference call for about a billion hours today and continuing on all week. When you're on a webcast and the slide says "slide 4 of 85" you know its going to be a loooong day. I think I need a vacation, some place like Hawaii sounds nice or maybe just even a cruise. I have no plane tickets pending to anywhere, which is unusual for me, but I guess its all part of the new "thrifty" Laura until I know if I need to save for school or not. Paying rent and a half next month is just going to be crazy fun, not to mention my new moving expenses. April is going to be a bitch...feel free to buy me stuff.

Freaky Friday

My boss took me out to lunch for no reason.

My missing black suit jacket reappeared.

The womens bathroom has a very strong "fresh cookies and brownies" smell.

I received an email containing this and only this:

"cargo bay around satiate related to tomato, and anomaly about brainwash dust bunny living with hockey player.He called her Deena (or was it Deena?).Where we can secretly fall in love with our photon.And sanitize the dark side of her fire hydrant.inside waif procrastinates, and bowling ball behind jersey cow hesitates; however, inferiority complex of make a truce with.constance bismarck attune postmaster cellophane boat."

Beat that.

For all of you not in Florida, or any other currently warm state, I'll be at the beach all weekend, so be jealous, be very very jealous. Ciao :)

Oh Enrique, you poor little lamb

So I dont know if its true or not, but supposedly Enrique Iglesias is engaged to Anna Kournikova. Now I dont really keep up with news on Miss Thang, but could you really want to marry someone who makes comments like:

"If you saw me with my clothes off, you'd see that my body is in great shape and ready to take on the world. I could snap my fingers and have any man I wanted, but I have too much respect for myself for that.''

Yet she doesnt have enough respect for herself not to make arrogant statements. This quote was supposedly an answer to the question if she had split up from Enrique, but please tell me how that even remotely answers the question. It's like you asking me, "So Laura, hows work going?" and I respond "Well I'm hot and all these guys want my body, and trust me its a good body, but Im not like that" OOkkkk.
I never even imagined this girl settling down anytime soon, isnt she like 22? She just seems too immature and like she still wants so many other guys. Oh Enrique, youve got your hands full.

All work and no play makes Laura a dull girl

So I have this new thing that I can't watch anything scary now that I live alone. I always tend to freak myself out with regards to ghosts and all that. I am still unable to sleep with my bed facing a mirror because I use to have a fear that I would wake up in the middle of the night and open my eyes and see something in the mirror. Weird, I know.

A lot of movies have scared me, but there are only a few that really freaked me out.

1) The Shining --for obvious reasons. Also, I actually went to the hotel/lodge that was the model for the one in the movie, its in California. It was pretty eerie.

2) IT -- I watched this for the first time in 5th grade and then had to walk home at dusk. I couldnt take my eyes off the sewer drainage things the whole time. For years I would glance at the drain while taking a shower.

3) The Devil's Advocate -- Looking back, this movie was more "freaky" than scary, but at the time it did the trick. I always think that scary movies with religious connections are the most frightening.

4) The Exorcist -- Now up until I was about 18, I had never seen this movie. So my whole family decided to get it one night and I was thinking, this wont be scary, its old and probably not believable. Well I watched the whole thing and then everyone went off to bed. Yeah. I paid my sister $5 to sleep in a bean bag in my room that night.

5) The Ring -- This has been my most recent scare. I saw this with Brian and was completely freaked out by the whole thing. I think it was the imagery of that tape that got me and that girl with her long black hair that covered her face, ugh. I dont think I went to be bed before 5 am that night, Brian, however,slept perfectly. In my current apartment my bed faces my closet door that I leave open, and occassionally I freak myself out by glancing at my closet while in bed and thinking that girl will be standing in there, with her hair all wet and then start doing that scary walk towards my bed. Its not that I TRY to scare myself, its just an inevitable thought when you are home alone.

There are a few movies that I havent seen and that I am hesitant to see unless I watch them when I am going to be spending the night with someone. Ive been told that "Cabin Fever" was insanely scary and I really want to see "Taking Lives". I also saw a commercial for that Stephen King miniseries "Kingdom Hospital" and the only thing that is scarier to me than a ghost is a little girl ghost who is mean. No way in hell I could watch that.

What is the movie(s) that scared the crap out of you?

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

So I got the mail yesterday and noticed my roommates tax return had come. She's getting back like $750. Yea. You know how much I'm getting back? Oh about $150, which will probably go right into the expense of moving into my new place. Terrific. This whole thing just pisses me off. I make more money, and I get shit back. I know its not a new concept or anything ,but I guess since Ive been making hardly anything until now, Ive just always reaped the benefits of having a shit paying job. Spare me on the "well wait until you make more and then you have PAY the gov't" because my dad already gave me that lecture. I guess I shouldnt be complaining, I'm still yet to hear from the leasing office about their "mistake".

So its St. Patrick's Day and I'm Irish. I feel like I should be doing something festive today, but instead I sit in my cube typing away to you people. My friend works for Friedman's jewelers in Savannah and the whole company gets the day off, bastards.

I came across this site yesterday. Wow, its mildly depressing , but defintitely entertaining. If you think YOU'VE had the worst date ever, make sure you read the horror stories section, they'll make you feel all warm and fuzzy.

Don't forget to punch anyone who isnt wearing green. Cheers!

Just when you thought you were more bored than I've been

I have to say first, that I have a great job with a great company, and I really do love it, but when you are the only IT person in the Marketing department, and no one questions or even understands what you do, well you can get pretty mischievious.

I also use to work in the web department of a university, which saw very little action and definitely a job where you got that "dear God, I can't take another hour" feeling, quite often.

Here are a few things, the university job included, that I have done to stay busy at work:

*gone through every, yes EVERY link on www.bored.com

*made multiple lists at various times: packing lists, shopping lists, my favorite movies lists, etc.

*reorganized my entire financial savings plan

*balanced my checkbook

*had 2 or 3 hour long IM sessions with friends

*blogged, and blogged, and blogged some more

*done my homework

*wandered all around campus while my boss was in a meeting

*done butt flexes at my desk

*wrote the basis of all three of my MBA application essays while in a "meeting"

*searched for: new apartments, airline tickets....yada yada yada

*planned out all my dinners for the week

*yesterday, made a list for Brian, of all my favorite postings on his blog.

*timed exactly how long it takes for a piece of trident gum to lose all flavor (roughly 6 minutes)

*planned exactly how I would seduce Christian Bale, if I ever had the chance, and if I looked like Heidi Klum


The funny thing about all this is that I'm a really good worker. I guess I just get my stuff done fast or something, I don't know. I know that most of you are in this same position, so what have you done to keep from falling asleep?

The seeds are out

Well for the first time since 1996, my alma mater, the University of Central Florida, has been invited back to the NCAA Tournament. We will be entering in as a 14 seed and going up against number 3 seed Pittsburg. Finally...something in UCF athletics to get excited about. Hopefully they'll make it through the first round and then things might get interesting.

On another note, at the Yankees/Braves game on Saturday, it was a little upsetting that barely any of the starters played. The Braves came on without their starting 3rd baseman, 1st baseman, and an outfielder, to name a few, and the Yankees were no different. Now it wasn't a big deal to me at all, still a really good game, but I felt bad for those kids who come so pumped to see these guys and they didn't play. Jeter just watched from the dugout the whole time while kids yelled and screamed for him. What's the point of that? Can't he even play for just an inning? I did get to see Braves closer John Smoltz come in for an inning and close out the 6th perfectly, so that was cool. Of course the highlight of the whole game was when the "special" boy in the wheelchair behind me coughed up part of a hotdog bun and it landed on my foot...can't beat that, gosh I love sports.

That's quite a mug

Ok well, I must say that I originally saw this article on another blog, however they were discussing the article, and I would rather discuss the picture of quite possibly the ugliest woman I've ever seen.
How the hell are people like this getting pregnant?

Instead of ranting and raving on this topic, I'll save that for the Yankees. I've got a baseball game to get to. Ciao.

Carnies, you know, carnival folk...smell like cabbage

Well up until now, a boy at my 8th grade school dance had held the prize for worst possible breath ever. The whole time we danced all I could smell was cabbage. Anyways, I thought that he would never be unseated from this title, but yet another contender has arrived today. I encountered someone who had what I like to call "old ham breath". Yea I'm not a fan of ham to start so this was by far utter torture.

So which was worse...the cabbage or the ham? Well in order to get a clear idea of what I am dealing with, follow these directions:

Cabbage: boil some cabbage, then find your stinkiest shoe and fill it with cabbage, place shoe in a box and put it in your car trunk on a hot day. At the end of the day, remove the cabbage have someone else chew it up and then blow in your face

Old Ham Breath: cook some ham, not honey ham, just plain old ham, and then leave a slab of it hanging from your porch for a few days, just long enough for it to get a few maggots or something on it. Take slab down, dont remove maggots, roll up like a burrito, then proceed with the eating and the blowing in the face

You be the judge

What a girl wants

You know what I would like to see?

*More movies with Jason Lee in them where he is not in a supporting role.

*A three digit number as my credit card balance.

*The Magic not suck anymore

*An acceptance letter from Fordham

*Someone besides me who thinks Elijah Wood is hot

*Pompeii

*French Toast every morning for breakfast

*A Dashboard concert where no one sings but Chris

* A snowy Christmas in Florida


Also, here is my guy tip for the day:
If a girl is walking by and as soon as she passes you turn around to check her out and make obscene gestures to your friends, make sure she isnt walking into a reflecting building.

Party of One

So I was thinking...

That sniper guy got the death penalty and that got me thinking about the last meal that they are given. Now as far as I know they can ask for pretty much anything they want, within reason, but I could be wrong. So I started thinking that if I was given a last meal before my trip to eternal damnation, I wonder what I would ask for.

I've narrowed it down to the following choices (assuming you cant ask for anything from a restaurant):

Fried Chicken, Mashed potatoes, corn on the cob, and biscuits (hmm can you tell I was born in Georgia?)

Burritos- but my Dad would have to make them

Tortellini with that pink sauce

Chicken Salad Sandwich and a strawberry/papaya smoothie


What's on your menu?

**Oh and p.s.--to all of you who tell me you like reading my blog yet I have never seen a comment from you, here you go, this is an easy one, so lets take off our shy hats and step into the arena.

SEVEN

So after a conversation I had with a friend regarding her boyfriend who has no idea what hes doing in the bedroom...I was reminded of a "Friends" episode. Study up boys.

Monica: Now everybody knows the basic erogenous zones. (She starts labelling them) You got one, two three, four (Chandler is shocked to find out there’s more than three), five, six, and seven!

Chandler: (shocked) There are seven?!

Monica: (continuing) Now, most guys will hit uh, 1-2-3 and then go to 7 and set up camp.

Chandler: That-that’s bad?

Rachel: Well if you go to Disneyland, you don’t spend the whole day on the Materhorn.

Chandler: Well you might if it were anything like 7!

Monica: All right uh, the important thing is to take your time, you want to hit ‘em all, and you mix ‘em up. You gotta keep them on their toes.

Monica: All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4, (Rachel starts getting worked up) 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7, …7..…7…7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7…(mouths 7)! (They both lean back on the couch satisfied.)

Office Space

Ok, now Im guessing that this has happened to many of you since it is now the second job in which it happens to me. Its not a big deal, but I just dont get it. The cleaning people for some reason find some kind of joy in moving all the stuff around on my desk. At first I thought that they might just be moving it to clean, but nope, that is definitely not the case. It is quite obvious they do nothing to my area but change out the trashbags and even that is questionable at times. So why the meddling? What do they get out of walking over to my desk and moving my pen holder from the left side to the right side? Sometimes I find my post-it pads just sprawled out all over the place. Its not enough to complain, but its defintiely enough for me to wonder. Then I start to think that maybe one of the cleaning people has a little kid that comes with him/her while they clean because this person can't afford childcare and its the kid that messes up my desk...but then that just makes me sad. I would much rather imagine a nosy little old lady who just likes to piss me off.

Just when you thought you were safe....from rejection

A couple of things to know before this post:

1) highschool was gay and I pretty much dont talk to anyone I went to school with except a select few that I am still friends with

2)in highschool, even though I had the same boyfriend for half of it, I had a huge crush on this guy named Will for all 4 yrs

3)a friend of mine that I went to highschool with,Simon, whom I talk to now and then, just recently found out about this crush, and happens to be close with Will

So tonight Simon im's me and asks me if I want to talk to Will...and Im pretty surprised by all this and wondering whats going on--I havent seen or talked to Will in years. He then tells me Will is single and then sends me a chat invite. So I accept, then Will enters the chat and Simon goes "ok, talk to you guys later" and leaves. Ok wtf? We were both obviously thrown into this so we kind of dont know what to say. So of course the general pleasantries are exchanged and I surprise myself by starting to feel the giddyness I use to feel for him. So we are chatting and then he hits me with...."well it was really nice talking to you, but I have a huge test on Thursday and I need to study, lets keep in touch though". YEAH, mmhmm, test my ass. Is it possible I just got dissed by my highschool crush when I am 24 yrs old? Is that even allowed? It is very possible he did have to study, he is in pharmacy school, but come on....15 min into the convo, gimme a break. So in summation, just when you think all the highschool crush/rejection shit is over, it comes back to bite you in the ass---just in case you forgot how shitty it felt the first time.

*If I could wish for it to be any night tonight I would want it to be that Family Feud/Jeopardy night at Vintage on the Green--good friends, good wine. I miss college.

slick like that

Only I would find a way to drop a whole cup of applesauce right on the crotch of my khaki pants, while at work.

Come on God, I know you are just dying to pull the fire alarm.

ramble ramble

Happy to say my interview went really well and there is a good possibility that I might actually be in grad school this fall, but until I get the letter, no more nyc daydreaming, just gets me too excited and freaked out.

In other thoughts...
Over the years Ive worked in a good handful of offices and I am still yet to understand why there are so many dumb phrases we use, that we all know are dumb, yet respond to them with fake laughter like it all makes sense. For instance, the classic "having fun yet?". Ugh. I hate that. I mean what kind of a question is that? Of course we arent having fun, we're at work. Yet I always respond with my simple one word answer that usually gets me out of anything -"always".

There use to be a lady at my old office that would prance around on Fridays saying "Happy Happy Friday". Its enough to make one vomit, or want to trip her.

On a positive note....Dashboard is finally back in Orlando this summer! I can't wait. I heart Chris......bigtime.

NYC......here I come?

Ever just wake up with a knot in your stomach on one of those days that could possibly change the rest of your life? Yep, thats me, today. I have my grad school interview with Fordham this afternoon and I'm a little freaked, but not for the normal reasons. I'm not super worried about the interview itself because I am pretty prepared for it, but I found myself throwing all kinds of scenarios at myself on the drive to work. I started wondering things that are probably common worries to the "new" New Yorker, but drive the real New Yorkers crazy. Things like:

-How do I go grocery shopping? I wont have a car, and thats a lot of stuff to carry on my own. I wonder how many grocery places there are around where I would live. Would I be a walking target to get my stuff stolen? (5'1 girl carrying lots of bags)

-Are there certain areas that I should just never be at alone? Im sure there are, but where are they? The subway is fine to ride alone during the day but not at night right?

-I never carry cash but I keep thinking I will be stuck in this situation in which my only way home is a long cab ride. Should I carry like $20 on me at all times?

These all seem like retarded questions, but I cant help but wonder about them. It would be different if I was moving there with someone, or if I knew even ONE person in the city, but I won't. I'm really ahead of myself in this situation because there is still the whole possibility of me not getting accepted, but what fun is that to daydream about?

I guess everytime I get ansy I'll just think about all the great things in NYC.....yea, that should definitely work. Wish me luck today!

Happy Happy Post!

**I have no plans this weekend which is GREAT. I am so tired of not being at my own place on the weekend. Plus its going to be sunny and beautiful all weekend which means lots of time at the pool or the beach--woohoo.

**My roommate got the job she wanted finally! Yay Sara!

**I got a call from Fordham University and they want an interview with me, yay!

**Ive made it a whole week without the leasing office realizing they made my lease out for less than they were suppose to and forgetting to ask for my $99 holding fee....wow, am I really this lucky? Time to buy a lotto ticket.

Have a great weekend :)

I'm too nice

So the same dumbass guy that I know that works for Monster keeps im'ing me with all these sexual undertones, which I am totally not into because he is so snotty and arrogant that it doesnt matter what he looks like. Today he tried to challenge me based on what we make which he says therefore says who is more important. I was actually left with this message from him: "Well let me know when you start making six figures and can hang with the big dogs". Then of course he immediately signed off so I couldnt respond. All the blood flowed straight to my head. If he was here I could have knocked him out. That statement is wrong on so many levels. Who does this schmuck think he is? I was being way too nice in the preceding conversation thinking, well he might make tons of money, but that wont buy him out of his vienna sausage size dick--but I never said a word. The funny thing is that I'm sure he will IM me later tonight trying to be all competitive again so I am formulating all kinds of things to say such as:

-I'm an heiress and only work for fun
-No matter how much money you have and how poor I could be, I would never sleep with you
-Or plan C- find a way to get him fired so he will shut up

If there is one thing I cant stand its cockiness. Its like a built in reflex of mine that if someone goes on and on about why they are so great, then I spend all my energy proving why their not.

Moral of this post--dont be a dick and we will all be better off

The other white meat

Ok I realize I do a lot of bitching on this blog, which I think is enjoyable, but others might think I am just a little bucket of misery. Well good news, I'm not--I am actually quite happy-go-lucky.

Ok, so after saying that--I have to bitch. Did anyone see newlyweds last night? I have to admit that my feelings toward Jessica Simpson have been love/hate since the show started. Well I am definitely back to hate and I have added a new member in there--her mom. It just blows me away how these 2 act.
So on the show last night, it shows Jessica and her mom out to eat and they start discussing what all moms and daughters do at luncheons--meat products. Well they come upon the discussion of bratwurst...or as Jessica likes to call it- "bratworth". They seemed to be puzzled by this mysterious meat....why is it white? Is it called "bratworth" or "brathwort"? Well they just dont know so Jessica decides to call Nick who is enjoying a bball game at the ESPN restaurant. Now any other guy I know that gets a call asking how to pronounce a type of pork while out with friends and watching the game would have been pissed---but no not Nick. It doesnt even phase him. Well after Jessica poses all her important questions and he says he doesnt know why its white--she innocently asks if anyone around him might know. Good Lord. So finally Nick draws the line and hangs up. They both look mystified. How will they be able to go spend all kinds of money shopping if they dont know why "bratworth" is white? Finally, her mom says "i know!....well its pork and pork chops are white too!"

Oh......my.......God

PRICELESS 2

-Starting my own blog: $0.00

-Money earned daily while writing in blog when I should be working: $35.00

-Finding friends who don't act like they are fucking cunts in their comments: PRICELESS

(yea I said cunt, its the new me, I'm sassy)

PRICELESS

I know some of you have probably seen this already, but I like it so I'm sharing it again.

This was sent by a friend who noted that a group of Syrians decided to hold an anti-American rally. Since they couldn't read and write English for their protest signs, they found an English-speaker to "translate" their anti-American slogans for them. They apparently made the mistake of asking the wrong guy to help them and he took matters into his own hands.




Bus Fare to anti-American Protest Rally: $0.50

Paint and Canvas Protest Signs: $32.00

Asking a retired U.S. Army Sergeant to translate your anti-American slogan: PRICELESS






P.S.--for my so-called "friends" who have already commented....yea I know its not real, but I still like it so fuck off

Honesty...don't believe the hype

First off--Seinfeld's 3 co-stars have finally agreed with the release of the Seinfeld dvd collection now that they will be receiving royalties from the sales. I have been waiting for this for years and its finally a step closer :)Ok, I know I'm a seinfeld dork, so dont waste a comment telling me that.

In other news....
So I signed my lease yesterday for my new place. The leasing lady I had been talking to had given me the price of the apt as $679 a month because there was a $30 a month fee for it being lakefront. The other part of the "special" was that I had to pay $99 to hold the apartment. So anyways, I get there to sign all the paperwork and its a different girl, who doesnt really know whats going on. She starts to fill out the lease and is filling it out for a regular apartment, that isnt lakefront, meaning its only $649 a month. So, I sit there, completely aware of her error hoping that I will be able to pull this off. Halfway through she finds some paperwork that the other girl had started and hands it to me to fill out the application. I notice on top that there is a paper that has the correct rent on it, so I quietly take the paper and tuck it in my purse while she is engrossed in her work. Its mine anyways right? So she continues on about the paperwork... I sign the lease and I am now waiting for her to ask me for the $99. Well that never happened. She gave me a copy of the lease and sent me on my way. I figure if I can make it to the end of tomorrow without a call from the office, I am free and clear--dont you think?